God, juz hope You'll answer me this Once..

Days are getting more fucked up.... I msned Hon yesterday, we tried to do video and voice chat, it was block by the hostel system.... and u know wat, she told me that the hostel connection dun allow them to do that..... This is real bad, to think of it, she went to swiss for 4 years, there are only 1 semester break at the end of every 6 months n this is the only time we could meet. The most we could meet is only twice a year, this is already so not enuff and we can't do any video or voice chat now?!?! How on earth m i really gonna survive this 4 years like this?

This is like the only cheapest n convenient way to communicate for students like us, I think these schools should enable this kind of service for international students as the call charges is really devastaing. I juz dun understand why things have to turn out this way, who can I blame? Who can I complaint it to? I know i can't ask help from God, i know i didn't really do anything much for Him before, but i juz need some simple guidance from him....

Life is getting tougher each day, bad things juz keep coming this way....
1. i'm still in my fucked up course which i dun like since i was in the first year,
2. my Hon left for switzerland for studies and i'm feeling all alone now,
3. i can't afford to go to europe to visit her,
4. i have a lots n lots of problems with my family lately making me more n more rebellious
5. i dun really haven any business or assets, which means i still have to rely on my parents,
6. i might get depression n die b4 this 4 years really end,
7. Devil within me is really overtaking me, turn me to a very cold blooded creature capable of doing harmful things...

There r juz too many things keep running in my mind... I really need guidance from 'You', plz answer me n tell me wat to do plz.....