The mood for Christmas

Hello everyone, once again, im back to the one-month-one-post again...

To a certain extend i really think of closing this blog, cause i usually dont spend time with it anymore, and i dont really feel the mood to blog like I used to. but i just cant let it go like that, it has too much memories that is still worth to linger on to...

Anyways, Christmas is around the corner. Shopping malls were decorated with christmas stuff and trees and christmas songs. Oh god, it just feels so calm and warmth and relax when Christmas is around.

I once thought of celebrating Christmas in a country that has real snow just make the whole Christmas perfect. During the night of Christmas, families stayed at home next to the warm fireplace and feast on a great meal, man its just like in the TVs.

While I will still be in Malaysia for a while, might as well enjoy the rain for Christmas instead of snow first =)

What have u guys been doing lately?

For me, Im finally gonna enroll myself in the hospitality degree this coming january, the happy thing is that i get to do what I've wanted to do, the sad thing is that skol is going to start so soon, it means end of my rotting days at home...

Well not exactly complaining since I've been fighting real hard to get into this course, its a little late, i will be 22 in 09 but I guess by looking at the bright side, I still get to do what i wanted to do, so yay! Anyway, thanks to mum for agreeing to support me in this course...

I just cant believe Im finally here now, Life is like finally starting to fall into pieces slowly...

except for one thing... I promise I'll talk about it the next time i blog..

I would like to wish everyone a wonderful Christmas in advance in case i'm not available till after Christmas.

Later guys...

The Duck with a Human Mind

As i was reading i came across this very interesting and meaningful passage from the book 'The New Earth by Eckhart Tolle' i must share with you guys, here goes...

I mentioned that after two ducks get into a fight, which never last long, they will spearate and float off in opposite directions. Then each duck will flap its wings vigorously a few times, thus releasing the surplus energy that built up during the fight. After they flap their wings, they float on peacefully, as if nothing has ever happened..

'IF' the duck had a human mind, it would keep the fight alive by thinking, by story-making. This would probably be the duck's story: "I don't believe what he just did. He came to within five inches of me. He thinks he owns this pond? He has no consideration for my private space. I'll never trust him again. Next time he'll try something else just to annoy me. Im sure he's plotting something already. But I'm not going to stand for this. I'll teach him a lesson he won't forget." And on and on the mind spins its tales, still thinking and talking about it days, months, and years later. As far as the body is concerned, the fight is still continuing, and the energy it generates in response to all those thoughts is emotion, which in turn generates more thinking. This becomes the emotional thinking of the ego. You can seee how problematic the duck's life would become if it had a human mind. But this is how most humans live all the time. No situation or event is ever really finished. The mind and the mind-made "me and my story" keep it going.

We are a species that has lost its way. Everything natural, every flower or tree, and every animal have important lessons to teach us if we could only Stop, Look, and Listen. Our duck's lession is this: Flap your wings - Which translates as "let go of the story" and return to peace..

So think about it, why do we always have these obsessive thinking?

Is it even healthy to resent someone?

Is everything still Alright?

Time really flies...

How is everyone doing lately?

Its 2.00 am in the morning now and Im still awake. Decided not to be killed by boredom in the middle of the night, i finally decided to do a minor update on my blog. 

Its been a month since i last updated my blog already

I've mentioned that ive been transferred to a hotel's kitchen to work. Working, to be honest,  has seriously numb my life. Giving me such limited time to do other stuff, I've been waking up very early in the morning driving to work and then finish work, Life's a bore really...

I no longer have that 'extra' time to do that something else. 

but look at the bright side, i was offered to do the things i love, meeting lots of interesting and experience people in the kitchen, and now plans to further my studies in the culinary art, what else could i hope for right?

Oh yea! I havent posted any photos bout the working environment Im in now, i'll try to upload some pictures in the next post.

Well, I better get some rest now... Tomorrow's a weekend, lets enjoy it =)

Unbreakable

Hello people!

Its really been a while since i blogged btw... This time im really NOT going to promise that i'll blog more often because i notice im really breaking it all the time =(

Ive been really busy lately working, oh yeah, many people didnt know that Ive been working at Secret Recipe for 8 hours a day for 10 days already. Prooooud of me eh?

At first i applied for the kitchen position, but they already have enough people in the kitchen, so i got an offer as a waiter. Having nothing to do at the moment, and stop myself from being killed by boredom, and also my mum's naggyness, i accepted it without any hesitation.

The Life as a Waiter aint an easy job u know? Bloody attitude customers i met everyday, being scolded for faults that u didnt do and still have to say sorry, it sux really. My manager's motto is 'Customers are always right', bloody yeah rite?!

So next time please treat your waiters/waitresses with more respect please!

The people in Secret Recipe has always been great to me, being so helpful in every way i needed it, eventhou its just merely 8 staff working there, they really gave me a very good first time working experience there, they taught me the importance of 'teamworking' to run a cafe.

The Kitchen, The Barrista, The Floor work together to make the cafe run smoothly... I really enjoyed working there =)

They say 'one thing leads to another' !

and tomorrow is my last day because Im offcially hired by Swiss Garden KL to work in their pastry kitchen.

Wanting to work in a kitchen was always my dream, I felt really so blessed to be given this opportunity. First i have no education in culinary and second i have 'zero working experience' in the kitchen, its a miracle that they accepted my application!

Learning the techniques to make 'hotel standard' pastries. I'll be making cakes and buns in no time.

Life just couldnt get better than this =)

'If that thing dont kill me, it only makes me stronger', says Kanya West in his song 'Stronger'

Out of all these hard times, I've learnt one thing, to become stronger, not just to become stronger, but to become unbreakable, and YES I am 'Unbrekable' now!


Once again, i'll try to blog more often! Try but not promise, gotta get some sleep, ciao!

If I Ain't Got You

Some people live for the fortune,
Some people live just for the fame,
Some people live for the power, yeah,
Some people live just to play the game,
Some people think that the physical things,
Define what's within,
And I've been there before,
But that life's a bore,
So full of the superficial.

By the time u finish reading the first part, the lyrics should sound familiar already, recently i fell in love with this really wonderful song 'If I Ain't Got You' by Alicia Keys and i can just listen to it for the whole day.

I was once a guy who believes that money rules everything. I was taught that everything including human have a price. By the look for our world now, Yes, Money still rule almost everything.

As for fame and power, I always wanted to be 'more' famous, to know more people so more people could know me.

Life itself was a Game to me, more like a game of chest. We are like front line, the pawns who only strive to move forward. Moving each step forward, and 'trying' to make a better way for someone else behind, only to find ourselves doomed first.

As for physical, most people can only see whats on the outside not on the inside. When i was young i tasted a type of fruit that looks like this:

Its so ugly on the outside, but taste so good on the inside. Why are we always so attracted to something attractive? This world is weird huh?

But Life's getting bored each day, now still holding to my own believes, I finally see a new hope, finally realized, cause i've been there before too,

Trust me...

'Everything really dont mean a thing if we couldn't share it with someone else'

Have you ever woke up early in the morning and feel that the air was so different today? or

Have you ever felt that ice water actually taste so much sweeter? or

Have you ever felt that this life was sooo made for you? or

Have you ever cant wait to meet this person? or

Have you ever drive in your car and can't stop thinking bout another person? or

Have you ever obsessively talks about another person when you are hanging out with your friends? or

Have you ever cant stop staring at somebody's picture? or

Have you ever felt in Love?

Oh no...
I'm in Love with a girl, again....

Being a Man

Due to my laziness of blogging for such a long time, i finally decide i should take the 'effort' to post some really sweet, touching article(like this newest one) like i used to do, in one reason, to make the world realize and hoping that some of these words could change someone's heart...

For my comeback, i present this very touching article of mother and son, 'Being a Man'


I am absolutely convinced that male behavior and thought processes begin th instant the X meets the Y chromosome. How else to explain giving birth to a fully formed, bona fide guy?

Our daughter, Annie, emerged into the world feather-soft, sweet smiling and light as a kitten. Her brother, Sam, on the other hand, came out raging and struggling . When I lifted his muscular body for the first time, it felt like i was picking up a bulldog. Even his newborn aroma had a husky quality. And what and enthusiastic appetite! No doubt about it, we had a son.

As Sam grew, so did his instinctive maleness - using Barbies as weapons of aggression, finding delight in all things gross and disgusting, hiding his tears when a beloved pet died. Skinned knees and elbows were barely acknowledged with momentary winces, and my maternal fussing was dismissed with a mildly annoyed, "I'm fine, Mom!" Then he was off again at the speed of tennis shoes. Eventually, i figured out how he wanted to be treated - like a boy.

But i soon discovered more aspects to his emerging masculinity than just toughness and machismo. He was protective of animals, solicitously attentive toward little girls, and quietly perceptive of pain or sadness in people who mattered to him. The first time he grabbed my arm at a crosswalk with an urgent warning about fast-moving cars, I was impressed by his manly assumption of responsibility for a lady's safety. He was in kindergarten at the time.

One hectic fall day when my husband was out of town, i decided to take the kids to our favourite family restaurant. Just as we were about to pull out of the driveway, seven-year-old Sam suddenly unfastened his seat belt and said, "wait a minute, Mom! I have to get something." Annie and i grew impatient with hunger while he searched for his GameBoy, Legos, Pokemon cards or whatever it was he couldnt last the evening without. He finally returned, pocket bulging, and we were on our way.

"So what did you decide to bring?" I asked at a stoplight.

"Well..." He replied with a measured words, " I went back to get my wallet because i want to take you girls out to dinner." His voice had a hopeful inflection, the kind of laying-his-heart-on-the-line sincerity i hadnt heard from a young man since high school.

I was stunned. What prompted this? His offer was sweetly touching, but i knew that such an act of chivalry would wipe out his entire summer's worth of saved allowance. My first instinct was to kindly decline, insisting that he keep his hard-earned money for something he wanted for himself.

But a strong force of guidance stopped me short, and a voice much wiser than my own urged me no to reject his loving offer. He wants to be a man... let him.

I looked back at my son's earnest face and saw that what he truly desired more than toys or candy was to be the provider, just like his dad and to take care of his women. The sudden rush of love i felt for him was so powerful I thought I would burst.

"Oh, Sam..." I stammered. "Thank you! I'd love for you to take us to dinner." He beamed with pleasure, and I found myself floating on a cloud when the light turned green.

From that moment on, the evening was infused with enchantment. I couldnt have wished for a more charming escort than this little man with a missing front tooth. When he leafed through the bills in his wallet (mostly ones) and magnanimously announced, "I want to leave a nice, big tip for the waitress," I could barely contain my pride. The magic remained even when he spilled his water, got in a loud argument with his big sister - and picked up the check, looking horrified. (I discreetly slipped a ten-dollar bill to him under the table, much to his relief.)

No dinner could ever have been appreciated more... but i was concerned by his silence and somber expression on the drive home. Did he regret the generous impulse that bankrupted him? I was strongly tempted to reimburse him for the tab, but thought better of it. Maybe I could find some pay chores at home to get him out of the red, while leaving his dignity intact.

"Mom... " he said solemnly as he slid out of the car. "I'm going to need a really good job when i grow up."

I couldnt help but smiling. In spite of his worries about the daunting responsibilities in his future, he was willing to accept the challenge.

"You know," I replied, "There's more to being a man than just earning money. It takes alot of love, and you already have plenty of that to give!"

I squeezed him with a long enveloping hug, and this time he returned it instead of squirming away.

Jean Harper

'Bloggerstinct'

No mood to blog lah really...

As u all can see, never update my blog for the past few months.

Well, this is another attempt to bring back my 'bloggerstinct'..

Will be updating very soon...

I promised...

(The whole color of my blog's layout will soon changed back to black)

Reconcile

Over the past few months, i hadn't really been updating my blog a lot... A lot of people actually asked, why u stop blogging? Why you dont post anything anymore? Do u remember you once own a blog?

Yes, i still have a blog and it is still very important to me! This blog has became an emotional storage to me, i write all my 'feel bad' stuff here to just to reassure myself. To be honest, it works most of the time.

I've discover that i only write my blog when i have emotional problems. It shouldn't be this way, not like this anymore.

I've been asking myself, what else do i need in my life now..

My heart always gave me this answer...

''You have everything''

Better in Time

I dont have to say much bout this, every single word in the song represents my emotional feelings right now at this moment, I'm so glad Leona Lewis sang this song, it would be that this song was really made for me.. Enjoy =)

It's been the longest winter without you
I didn't know where to turn to
See somehow I can't forget you
After all that we've been through

Going, Coming
Thought I heard a knock, Whose there, Noone
Thinking that, I deserve it
Now I have realized
That I really didn't know

If you didn't notice
You mean everything, quickly I'm learning
To love again, all I know is
I'm be ok

Thought I couldn't live without you
It's going to hurt when it heals too
Oh yeah, It'll All get better in time
Even though I really love you
I'm gonna smile because I deserve too
Oh, It'll all get better in time

I couldnt turned on the TV
Without something that would remind me
Was it all that easy?
To just put us out your feeling

If i'm dreamin
Don't want to let it hurt my feelings
But that's the past, i believe it
And I know that, time will heal it

If you didn't notice
Well you mean everything, quickly i'm learning
Oh turn up again, All I know is
I'm be ok

Thought I couldn't live without you
It's gonna hurt when it heals too
Oh yeah, It'll all get better in time
Even though I really love you
I'm gonna smile because I deserve too
Oh, It'll all get better in time

Since there's no more you and me
This time I let you go so I can be free
And Live my life how it should be
No matter how hard it is
I will be fine without you
Yes I Will

Thought I couldn't live without you
It's gonna hurt when it heals too
Oh, It'll all get better in time
Even though I really loved you
I'm gonna smile cos I deserve too yes I do
It'll all get better in time

Thought I couldn't live without you
It's gonna hurt when it heals too yeah
Oh oh, It'll all get better in time
Even though I really loved you
Going to smile cos I deserve too
Oh, It'll all get better....

What hurts the most

Its really been a while since my last post, my blog is dying of inactivity... Dont really 'feel like it' to write or update anything until recently. Still feeling a bit shattered.

'Life was not treating me very good lately'..

Despite of all that that happen to me, it ended up in such a terrible end, i couldnt have figure out or had no idea that it could turn out this way. I'm glad its over. Old things die and new things will be born, thats what the whole world been saying or this phase should sound very familiar 旧的不去, 新的不来...

Its finally more than a month that we didnt talk to each other, getting on with each of our lives, I'm still missing her and been wondering how is she doing lately. I bet she is busy with her work and socializing with her colleague, they all been treating her really good. No words could describe how badly i wanted to know how is she doing really right now, very simple stuff like how is she feeling right now, has she eaten yet, she had enough sleep for tomorrow's work. Juz simple things like that still bothering me.

I think i'm really stupid, wondered why still care so much when someone doesnt want me to care for them anymore.

I remember during the time after we broke up, i bought so many books to read on so i could 'try to learn' to become a better person, and most importantly a better lover for her. In whatever situation, 'i try think in her shoes', and to be honest, i think i'm being very generous. I've been living for more than 21 years now, never had i had such hard times b4, never experience such pain before...

I'm not sure she realize this or not, she always thinks what she did was right. I was the one who broke it up, but i was also the one who tries to get her back and i wondered she'll recall what kind of attitude she treated me with. I really hope she stop being so childish and blames everything on me.

Our relationship was juz merely six month, it really meant alot to me, i'm so glad that she once, willing to spent her life with me. I'm also grateful that she taught me so much, thanks for teaching me to be a gentleman, thanks for teaching me to 爱就爱的疯狂...

Even I still miss her, i'm so glad it finally ended, i'm so tired.... I'll wish her well in whatever she does, 我也什么都不想管了, if blaming me really made her happier, ignoring me really made her happier, and treating me like this really made her happier, good then, this is the last 'happy' thing i could give her...

What hurts the most is to be hurt by someone you love so much and being blame for everything...

Love hurts....

A word of caution: Dont drink and Drive

Read a very interesting email from a friend and would like to share it in the blog =)


I went to a party,

And remembered what you said.
You told me not to drink, Mum
So I had a sprite instead.

I felt proud of myself,

The way you said I would,
That I didn't drink and drive,
Though some friends said I should.

I made a healthy choice,

And your advice to me was right,
The party finally ended,
And the kids drove out of sight.

I got into my car,

Sure to get home in one piece,
I never knew what was coming, Mum
Something I expected least.

Now I'm lying on the pavement,

And I hear the policeman say,
The kid that caused this wreck was drunk,
Mum, his voice seems far away.

My own blood's all around me,

As I try hard not to cry.
I can hear the paramedic say,
This girl is going to die.

I'm sure the guy had no idea,

While he was flying high,
Because he chose to drink and drive,
Now I would have to die.

So why do people do it, Mum

Knowing that it ruins lives?
And now the pain is cutting me,
Like a hundred stabbing knives.

Someone should have taught him,
That it's wrong to drink and drive.
Maybe if his parents had,
I'd still be alive.

My breath is getting shorter, Mum

I'm getting really scared.
These are my final moments,
And I'm so unprepared.

I wish that you could hold me Mum,

As I lie here and die.
I wish that I could say, 'I love you, Mum!'
So I love you and good-bye.

Author's note:

Sometimes you not only spoil your own Life, you might spoil someone's perfect Life too...

This article may be a fiction, but fictions exist for a reason, exist for someone who is afraid that someday terrible things like this could happen, maybe it has happened before, maybe it has not, but that someone is really making an effort to tell you dont let things happen like this...

We can always make a difference...

Something I treasure...

Something i treasure.....

Just a simple question like this gave me those sleepless nights... Keep thinking of how screwed up my Life is at the current state... I've been thinking bout the past alot lately... Mostly bout all the Hows and Whats that happen to me lately..

Last week was really a boooooring week, everyone's ass is like so glued to their computers, and everyone is having WOW(World of Warcraft) fever now. Wanting to find someone to talk to seems like a very difficult task now... But lucky Bra decided to come down and chill for the weekends, Life seems a bit easy from there =)

I really appreciate his effort to listen to me... Most man are lousy listeners, whenever u address an issue, they most probably give an idea on how to fix it and that is not what i'm seeking, just wanted someone to be present and be there to listen, thats all...

I told him bout my issues on my family and my Life... He listens and listens and listens.. and he told me something in the end, ''try harder and just do it, you might never know what surprises God has left for you, since that is something u treasure so much...''

Hmmmm..... I realized i had forgotten a very important quote I Love to use so much in my Life last time, 'People gave us too soon when they failed to realize how close they are to success'

I think I've tried hard, but i guess i have to try harder this time and face fear itself now...

Once again, I've found Hope in my most dreaded moments again...

Life goes on now...

Theres gotta be more to Life!

Lately I've been feeling abit not myself again.. Looking back at few weeks ago, I alwiz said this, I'm pretty sure i'm okay last few weeks ago. I wonder why do i alwiz have emo spike like a woman..

Since that argument i had with my Mum last few weeks ago, it has left me devastated.. Everything i do i felt so empty, everything was never enough anymore.. Weeks of sleepless nights, kinda got me off track from my life, I'm lost... Supports from books i'm reading wasnt enough to make me feel good...

Until last 2 days ago. The night when I had 3 dreams in 1 night.. It somehow pushes me to a whole new level of consciousness.

1st dream: I had this wonderful dream when I'm with 'Her'. We were going out together like last time, sharing alot common interests, dine in our favorite place. I still remember things were so perfect when we just got together =) Then its time we decided to bring each other to meet our parents, those feelings of how would his/her parents think of me feelings really excites me. It reminds me of how loving and happy we used to be...

2nd dream: I woke up one morning to discover that my dog Fuji was waiting for me to wake up outside my door, i'm not sure how he ended up back here but its JUST LIKE LAST TIME! When he used to stay with me in KL, i remember the days when i bring him out for a drink with my friends. Bring him on a walk in the garden. Fetches him to shower on the grooming centre every weekends.

3rd dream: I had a really bad day... and someone came up to me and tell me, do what you feel like doing because you will see the results soon and always remember that 'Theres gotta be more to Life'

I woke up after the 3rd dream... Even though the 3rd wasnt very special, but it somehow makes me realize that life was indeed to be abundant, do what u feel like doing huh? I think I know who is responsible for making me realize this =)

I deeply express my gratitude towards God who made me realize that...

Some pictures of my vacation in Thailand

As promised, here are some of the pictures i took when i was on my vacation in Thailand =) Thailand is really very nice place to visit, really enjoyed very much the whole trip..

The famous 'Floating Market'

They sell all kinds of stuff, foods, drinks anything u can name..

Its our turn to explore the market!

No wonder they say bangkok has the worse jam... EVEN the river have traffic jam...

A pot for us guys to pee on

Handmade souvenirs like this are sold everywhere along the river

These are some pictures of many temples in the compound of the Royal Palace

Very weird looking characters like this are found all over Thailand

This is the formal Royal Palace

This is the largest teakwood mansion found in Thailand

Victory Monument

I'm back =)

Finally came back from Bangkok yesterday! Sawadeeka(Hello in Thai)!

The trip was amazing! Bangkok is amazing! Nice place to shop, drink, see around, hang out, I already planned to go back there very soon=) In Bangkok, they sell all kinds of stuff. In the famous flea market called Chatuchat, they have all the very cheap goods, the price was super cheap too, the cheapest T-shirt i saw was 40-60 Bath(RM4-6). Their people are so much friendlier than those people in Petaling Street..

Went to Patpok too, the famous red light district. They have all those very erotic bars, where naked girls dance on the stage, live Sex shows, demonstration of pussy tricks like ping pong, can opening etc etc... Wasnt worth to evaluate much anyway, if u guys have the chance to witness it, do it, then u'll know what becomes of our world, the corruptions and plague of our own humanity.

Miss my friends so much, I hope everyone have a very nice Chinese New Year.. Hope to hang out and club with them very soon.


Oh yeah! Love is everywhere because.... Valentine's Day is this Thursday! I would love to wish all the couples all the best in your relationship, and congratulations because you've found that special someone, its the most romantic day of the year to show them how much they meant to u. These are the few important things to do for your love ones:

1. Give your love ones a very big and tight hug!
2. Kiss them passionately!
3. Flowers and chocolate is a must..
4. Bring them to dine in a nice warmth, cozy and romantic place. If you dont want to waste money, cooking for her is extremely sexy too=) Some candles will make the dinner sexier..
5. Buy/Make them a very sentimental gift. The price is not important, the heart that counts. This gift will show how much u pay attention to her, so be very clear what to choose!
6. and most importantly tell them how much you Love them and how much they meant to you in your Life..

Gotta sleep now, will update with some pictures i took in Bangkok in the next post. Good nite everyone =)

To Bryan, Jocelyn, Rehui, Calvin, Challen, I'm finally ready, Wish me luck, I hope its not too late too, because The Hot Pursuit finally starts now!

Hello Malaysia!

I've reached Bangkok yesterday night and will be staying here until next Monday...

Starting to miss Malaysia already...

Will be posting some pictures when i have the time.

One last thing, wish everyone a very happy and a very prosperous Chinese New Year =)

The Seasons of Love

Many people actually give up on their relationship too soon, my favorite quote; Many people give up too soon when they fail to realize how close they are to success. This very important quote is what still keeping me going forward so hard today.

After rereading some of the topics in a book i got from a friend last time called 'Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus' by John Gray. I finally understand that I too failed to understand that Love has its own seasons too, just like our earth's climate.

The Seasons of Love

A relationship is like a garden. If it is to thrive it must be watered regularly. Special care must be given, taking into account the seasons as well as any unpredictable weather. New seeds must be sown and weeds must be pulled. Similarly, to keep the magic of love alive we must understand its seasons and nurture love's special needs.

The Springtime of Love

Falling in love is like springtime. We feel as though we will be happy forever. We cannot imagine not loving our partner. It is a time of innocence. Love seems eternal. It is a magical time when everything seems perfect and works effortlessly. Our partner seems to be the perfect fit. We effortlessly dance together in harmony and rejoice in our good fortune.

The Summer of Love

Throughout the summer of our love we realize our partner is not as perfect as we thought, and we have to work on our relationship. Not only is our partner from another planet(Men and Women are very different), but he or she is also a human who makes mistakes and is flawed in certain ways

Frustration and disappointment arise; weeds need to be uprooted and plants need extra watering under the hot sun. It is no longer easy to give love and get the love we need. We discover that we are not always happy, and we do not always feel loving. It is not our picture of love.

Many couple at this point become disillusioned. They do not want to work on a relationship. The unrealistically expect it to be spring all the time. They blame their partners and give up. They do not realize that love is not always easy; sometimes it requires hard work under a hot sun. In the summer season of love, we need to nurture our partners needs as well as ask for and get the love we need. It doesn't happen automatically.

The Autumn of Love

As a result of tending the garden during the summer, we get to harvest the results of our hard work. Fall has come. It is a golden time - rich and fulfilling. We experience a more mature love that accepts and understands our partner's imperfections as well as our own. It is a time of thanksgiving and sharing. having worked hard during summer we can relax and enjoy the love we have created.

The Winter of Love

Then the weather changes again, and winter comes. During the cold, barren months of winter, all the nature pulls back within itself. it is a time of rest, reflection, and renewal. this is a time in relationships when we experience our own unresolved pain or our shadow self. It is when our lid comes off and our painful feelings emerge. It is a time of solitary growth for love and fulfillment. It is a time of healing. This is the time when men hibernate in their caves and women sink to the bottom of their wells.

After loving and healing ourselves through the dark winter of love, then spring inevitably returns. Once again we are blessed with the feelings of hope, love and an abundance of possibilities. Based on the inned healing and soul searching of our winter journey, we are then able to open our hearts and feel the Springtime of Love again once more.

The Springtime of Love --> The Summer of Love -->The Autumn of Love --> The Winter of Love
(Do you see the Seasons of Love now?)

There is always an exception for everything.. By really try to understand the Seasons of Love, you will soon discover the pattern why sometimes your partner is so grumpy and why sometimes they are so loving. Try to understand why are they not so loving as last time.

Love requires a lot of passion and effort. Fight for what you want, this world is realistic, you dont work hard you dont get wat you want. Always remember, the word hopeless doesnt really exist until u decided its really hopeless, or when u are dead..

I wish you loving couples all the best =)

(Sources in this post are mainly from the book Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus by John Gray)

世界唯一的你

I was looking at youtube, saw this really lovely, romantic and touching video which i really feel like sharing it with everyone, its a short clip about people proposing to their only one, 世界唯一的你..

Its really Loving to see people love so sweetly, i already hear some people saying they dont need anyone/another half/soul mate/girlfriend/mate/partners in their Life. To be honest, I'm sorry for you...

I always think that God gave us such a wonderful world with such wonderful people around us to meet and with such wonderful people to love and share experiences with, and most people is really using those resources they can get their hands on very efficiently, Way to go to those people who find Love in this such miserable world we are living, You have my Blessings!

(If you would listen to the song called What a wonderful world by Louis Armstrong, you'll understand what i'm trying to mean here)

I really wonder why people still always have to ask me why are u still doing all this for Her now? Why do people always ask Why? Is there really an explanation for Love?

When people dont care, they dont really wanna know anything bout that person. Nv really wanna do anything for them anymore. If u ask me honestly, Yes i still Love her, very deep right inside my heart yes, a thousand times u would ask, the answer will never change.. I'm just doing my best and what i think is required for my only one, my 世界唯一的她.

I'm not sure where does all this will lead me to, but I'm not really stupid and i know what i'm doing right now, I tried hard, but i guess I have to try harder..

To me, 她就是我世界唯一的她, and i love her with all my heart...

Back to the Hole

A man walks into a forest to look for some sort of treasure(he called it). Before entering, his friends told him and also warned him that the thing he was looking for wasnt so precious after all. He didnt listen and cared much what other people think as he only do what his heart tells him to. His friends could only wish him well.

Walking... walking... in the quiet forest, he accidentally tripped and fell into a very deep hole somewhere inside the forest. Oh no! I'm trapped! He is totally in controlled by the hole that consumed him. Everything he do was so powerless, everything he do was so hopeless, everything he do was so limited, he felt stuck but He never give up and try hard climb back up, finally he sees light and now his out of the hole.

He returned to town where all his friends got unhappy bout what happened to him.. One of his friend even said 'dont tell me u gonna trap yourself in that hole again for the second time please'. Obviously he didnt listen to them.

This time he went back into the forest again, maybe to get stuck or to improve the situation, who knows...

That man is me....

Many people may get confused bout this post, but it is related to a experience in my Life now, so i assume only those who know what is going on with my life knows what i'm trying to deliver here.

(Updates: changed the sound of my soul, removed the dogs pictures Fuji & James Bond(will update when i have better ones), removed the facts bout this blog section too)

Stop and Stare!

I love this song so much now, its call Stop and Stare by One Republic, Listening to it like crazy everyday...

This town is colder now, I think it's sick of us
It's time to make our move, I'm shakin off the rust
I've got my heart set on anywhere but here
I'm staring down myself, counting up the years
Steady hands, just take the wheel...
And every glance is killing me
Time to make one last appeal...
for the life I lead

Stop and stare
I think I'm moving but I go nowhere
Yeah I know that everyone gets scared
But I've become what I can't be, oh
Stop and stare
You start to wonder why you're 'here' not there
And you'd give anything to get what's fair
But fair ain't what you really need
Oh, can u see what I see

They're tryin to come back, all my senses push
Un-tie the weight bags, I never thought I could...
Steady feet, don't fail me now
Gonna run till you can't walk
But something pulls my focus out
And I'm standing down...

Stop and stare I think I'm moving but I go nowhere
Yeah I know that everyone gets scared
But I've become what I can't be, oh
Stop and stare
You start to wonder why you're here not there
And you'd give anything to get what's fair
But fair ain't what you really need
Oh, you don't need

What u need, what u need...
Stop and stare
I think I'm moving but I go nowhere
Yeah I know that everyone gets scared
But I've become what I can't be
Oh, do u see what I see...

(changed the sound of my soul)

No reason

For no reason i'm feeling very moody these few days, every tomorrow seems to be very boring to me, I prefer to not go out and stay at home to rot.. Perhaps going to class these few days have make me exhausted, for such a long time never have the habit to wake up early in the morning to go class, really miss the holidays =( I'm felt so powerless and lifeless everyday now.

Before i'm really adapt back to the life now, sigh... here comes Chinese New Year again, the festival of noisy lion dances and firecrakers that cloud the skies, together with those very noisy gamblers. In my own words, I too can call it the 'Festival of Sound Pollution'.

Been playing with my guitar these few days too. Yes, the one that i didnt touch for a damn long time. I have some 灵感 these few days, which encourages me to write music, i wrote some lyrics but cant really get the right music for it =( Hope i'm able to come out with something this time.

One last thing, Thank God for showing me the right track again. I know its up to me now...

Shocking Friday

Last week was my first week of class...

Was enjoying hanging out with my friends, its a been a long time doing crazy stuff with them, really miss them. Just when i thought everything was okay, so we went to Mardigras for clubbing on Friday last week. Everything was okay =) Almost everyone was there, talking 'cocks' and chilling out, we even met 2 more girls, sweeeet!

Until one of the girl's dad called, its urgent and she really have to go. So i offer myself to give her a ride back. This is when the situation a good guy being treated bad for no reason. I reach her house and her dad was angry at me for no reason, I said to him softly and politely 我只负债送你女儿回家, 什么都没做. I have no intention of talking bad bout her dad. But in the end i got hurt and i drove away. I have no idea of what really happen, i was so innocent looking at him, why was he like that?!

Well, i'm okay already now... Living to every breath i could still inhale, walking every tomorrow's steps slowly, I felt better for not blaming him =)

(changed the sound of my soul)

First week of School

Well, most people including me has already started class. Have 2 wake up early in the morning get ready for class and then drive on the freaking jams. Man! this is tiring but to be honest, after 2 months of holidays, i realy miss the hustle and bustle of city life =)

Even though i only have 4 subjects in this this sem but i shud be more busy now, bcoz more labs and assignments, i even have a mini practical now. The first week in class wasnt quite special though, still seeing those familiar faces i've been seeing for the past few sems, really nothing special.....

Everyone is back from their hometown now, that 'Daddy' is back too =) we've been hanging out like we used to. Going out having fun, Life is just great at its beginning. Nothing is better than spending all your time doing nothing with those useless 'buthers'.

Tomorow is Friday already, a week has past 'just like that', and its another weekend, Lets go PARTY!

Standing Firm

Well, the blog was dead for some time already, i guess its time for some update again...

Yesterday was the countdown of a New Year. Everyone was eagerly counting every last hour, every last minute and every last second of 2007, then 'boom' here comes the fireworks to welcoming a New Year 2008.

Australia's 2008 Fireworks, its really breathtaking

To many people, a whole new year means a whole new lots of new resolution again. Arh, i still remember my last year's resolution, i guess only less than half of it actually succeeded. But every year there is alwiz an important lesson to learn.

This year, I've learned to Stand Firm.

Alot has happened in 2007. From family problems to friendship problems to relationship problems. Just when i thought nothing could be worse than this, i was wrong... My own negativity has fully consumed me. Eventhou there were alot of ppl who are trying to help me all the time, indirectly i was too stubborn and ignore them.

Till almost the end of 2007, i finally lost something that I think is very precious to me in my Life. I was pushed to a whole new level of growth. I muz admit it, its really painful.. My eyes were finally open, now i could see more than i can usually see.

Take a proper look in every problem, there is alwiz a way out u know? All we need to do is Stand Firm! Dont move and ask yourself what do you want?

Noone know ourselves better than ourselves, we know what we want. So, why so easily let other people's words or thoughts influence you?

I finally know, when i really want something, i really need to work hard, afterall we are how we work...

You and I know that we cant control what other people wanna do to us, so let them do whatever they want, think whatever they want, talk whatever how they want. The only thing we can do is be a better person ourselves.

I tried hard, but i guess i could try harder =)

(Changed the sound of my soul)